Eight Days Free....

I have done it....made it through 8 days of my 40 day goal "diet coke' and "M&M" free.
That is not to say that I have been totally caffeine and sugar free. I have become a serious coffee drinker recently. Not your Folgers medium roast blend with cream and sugar. I am into Golden Toffee Vanilla with Caramel Hazelnut creamer and one packet of Truvia please. I know that is not really coffee but it helps me make it through the afternoon hours in a Jessica Simpson "perky" state instead of being a carbon copy of Maxine.
Surprisingly I am living headache free for the first time in ages. Sugar sends me into an early stage of a diabetic coma. I find myself needing a lengthy nap to cure exhaustion and headaches. So, why am I so addicted. Why do I want to eat something that makes me so miserable.....? No answer for that. The pleasure of a large serving of coconut cream pie makes me smile, for a moment. Then I pay the price.
Now I have 32 days in front of me and I know I can do it. My goal is to make this a permanent state....to free myself of a product that is used to clean car batteries. To replace sugar with healthy...I am trying. But there is a problem with all of this and that is my report for tomorrow.

V.A.C.A.T.I.O.N!!!!!.....

I do not leave here much. I am a homebody. I have a 5 mile comfort range. Everything I need is right here. But, every once in awhile you have to escape and take a VACATION! That time came this week. It was a short 48 hour journey but made a world of difference to my psyche. It was a total relax. That is the best type of getaway. No time line, no schedule, no dress clothes, and no one who needed me...just pure heaven.
With travel bag and bottled water in hand Chris and I headed 100 miles down the road to spend a couple days in what we like to think of as paradise...the Hail's lake house. It should really be labeled as something other than a lake house because it beats any 5 star resort here in the state of Texas! As a special treat on our two day retreat we ventured into a nearby town and visited the quilt shop. Well, you know how I felt about that!!! Fabric, fabric, and more fabric. Patterns and quilt kits and just endless things to feel and see.

I wasn't the only one in awe of all the beautifully pieced wonders.

Around the corner on the way to lunch we found a welcome sign set up just for us...oh, wait...it was a whole building constructed in our honor. We tried to find a local to take our picture but I think they all ran when they saw us coming!

Such an appropriate sign for the time we had together. It was nothing but great laughs and silly girl time. Nothing could be better than that.

Time to say goodbye to the small town with the great quilt shop and head back to the lake.

Can you really imagine anything more restful than a huge lounge chair, a lake view and awesome girlfriends for two days? I can't. It was just what the doctor ordered. I am nothing but a new woman...ready to face reality once again. Bring on the dirty dishes and the laundry. I am renewed!

Sacrifice.....

So...I have been giving the Lent idea some thought for quite awhile. It is all about sacrifice. It is about doing without something that is a challenge to give up. There is a long list of things that apply appropriately in my life I assure you. I could start with technology. Giving up Facebook would be tough. Pinterest...total withdrawal for me! Game apps on my phone and Kindle...well not playing Words With Friends would upset my friends...they need a partner.

So...what to do?

How about giving up this......the McDonald's Drive through.

I pick up this for lunch more times a week that I am willing to admit. I am FAT. I am miserable. I do not like how I feel. I have headaches from too much sugar, and belly fat...lots of it. I watch Dr. Oz daily and he has many methods for curing all of this but watching the TV is not curing my problem.

So I bought this. Yes, fruits and waters. No more Diet Coke for 40 days. I can do it. I have before. I felt better. But, as soon as lent was over it was back to McDonald's. I am also trading in my cookies for an apple. Note to family...I did not say giving up cookies.....just eating them less frequently. Less cake, less ice cream and NO M&M's. I can do it. So to reward myself in advance.....

I bought this. This is a FITBIT. It is my clip on conscience. It will measure my calories consumed, my steps taken, my stairs climbed, my sleep habits, and probably my sex life...or lack thereof. It will tell me how I am living for the next six weeks. I am excited. Maybe it will make a difference. I have a lot of reasons to be healthy...and unless I do something I am on a downward spiral to FATTER.

Today I am hooking this up. I am ready to go. I am going to be in shape and LOVE it I am sure. If it makes this mission as addictive as checking my Facebook (as stated on the package) then I can't wait to get started! Forty days...I am ready to go!

It's Fat Tuesday!!!!...

Yes, it is here. Today is Fat Tuesday...the end of the Mardi Gras holiday. Mardi Gras actually means Fat Tuesday in French. It is the day when people overeat, overdrink, and party until the stroke of midnight. Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, the official beginning of the Lenten Season. For a child born into a good Catholic family, I have grown up with the traditional no meat on Ash Wednesday or Good Friday belief. It is also a 40 day period that Christ fasted to atone for our sins and we are in turn to make a sacrifice during the days leading up to Easter.

Well, folks this is easy. I am FAT...not just on this appropriately named Tuesday but on every other day of the week. Being at home has allowed me to eat at will...hourly. My body is showing signs of M&M's, earthquake cake, too many lunch's out, and just plain careless choices. New years resolutions do not work for me. I cannot focus on a year. Too long...I know I will fail. But 40 days....Hmmm...we will see.

So today I decide. Tomorrow I start. I have 15 hours to make up my mind what to do for Lent. I have some ideas....for tomorrow!

Tiptoe Through The Tulips......

Sounds a bit like we might be channeling the ever so memorable Tiny Tim whose one claim to fame was this stick in your mind and never go away ballad. But, these tulips are the work of my husband who is beaming with pride as each new one blooms.

We surely cannot compete with the Arboretum but they make him happy nonetheless. It was a venture he undertook early in the fall. He carefully selected the bulbs, refrigerated them, and set them free in the dirt after researching the correct time for planting.

All of this came during a time when he also so eagerly blew up his Christmas penguin in the front yard for all the neighbors to see. I have to sit back and carefully assess this erratic (not erotic) behavior because this comes from a person who is as tough as nails on the exterior. I believe he is getting in touch with a whole new side of himself as he ages. I am kind of delighted to see this new person emerge but for anyone who is a bit concerned....I really do not think he is ready to turn in his "man card" yet...just sayin'!

It's a Date!!!....

Good Golly....It's Miss Molly!!!!

Every Friday morning at 10:00 a.m. Brooklynn and I have a scheduled date.
It has been a reconnaissance mission of sorts...checking out all of the library story times in the area, and it is hands down unanimous...Miss Molly is the winner! It all began this summer when we were in need of an activity that kept us out of the blistering heat. The teacher in me decided the library filled with books was a good place to begin.

So we started the hunt for something entertaining, educational, and structured and you just cannot match Molly's enthusiasm for what she presents to the kids.

She has a knack for holding the youngest one's attention and structuring a 30 minute time period with songs, games, and books that even entertain myself and all of the other grandparents in attendance.

Best of all...it is free!!!

So thanks Miss Molly!!! You make Friday morning something Brooklynn and I both look forward to! You ROCK!

Valentines Fun!....

Just Pictures......

A special day to spend with some special little girls! All ruffles, tutu's and big hair bows!! Gramps is adapting well to the things little girls do. It is not to hard for them to get him wrapped around their finger! And, the rest of the family seems to be loving it all as well.

On My Mind.....

I have pretty much been consumed lately by thoughts of my cousin. He is dying. I think that is much harder for me to say than it is for him.

Richard has cancer. He is very close to my age and was diagnosed last summer. His prognosis was not promising back then but he did everything he could to fight this awful demon. For a short while it looked like he had won. He was in remission and had a new outlook on his future. But now this disease is back with a vengance and the time he has left is not lengthy. I know miracles can happen but Richard is facing what he expects with such dignity and humor.

I had the opportunity to talk to him for a good while last week. He is the same. On the other end of the line there was no clue that he was even ill..except for his occasional remarks about what was to come. We reminisced, talked about family, and how he spends his days. It was hard for me to hang up. I wish I was closer. I think time spent with him now would be a treasure. In his words..."Patti, I would fix you a drink, I would have some morphine and we could visit!" Oh, to be able to be honest and humorous at the same time.

It makes me wonder how I would handle the same sentence he has been given. What would I do with my days and how would I feel each morning about the hours ahead? I know I would write, because that is what I love to do. I feel a need to leave everything in my head on paper (hence, this blog). I would possibly have to give up time in my sewing room because I would want to spend time in a manner less self involved. I would sit outside because that is where I am happiest. It also made me realize that though it is nothing I am looking forward to, I am not afraid. Maybe having lost a son makes death seem less scary. I realize that on the other side of what I know now is what I miss so much. I have so many thoughts today. It is not someplace my mind usually is but for some reason it has been where my head wanders lately.

So, I am praying for as much time as God is willing to allow Richard to stay here. And I am grateful to Richard for carrying my message along with him to heaven. He has given me so much.

Fearless......

It is so amazing to watch this child develop into the toddler she is. She is curious, bright, and defiantly fearless!!!

Dr. Pepper, with sugar please.....

I did not really know anything about the intricacies of soft drink bottling until the Dublin, Texas Dr. Pepper bottler was forced to discontinue production of Dr. Pepper, the only one of the Snapple group producers to still use "pure cane sugar" in it's products. All others use HFCS (otherwise known as high fructose corn syrup) in their drinks. Well, first of all I do not consume soft drinks with sugar. I am totally committed to only putting artificial sweetener into my body. You know that one used in diet drinks that is thought to cause overweight people with too much girth around the middle in the latest study by the FDA. None of that real stuff for me...I only drink FAKE thank you!

Actually, I have recently committed to putting myself on a healthier track so I quit buying diet drinks all together...well, at least there are none stored at my house anymore. I believe that we should be smarter about the unknown ingredients in the food and drinks we consume. BUT, sometimes a day calls for something that tastes better than water so I have occasionally snuck through the line at McDonald's for a large diet coke, with extra ice please! But maybe it has been more often than I think because the other day on a trip through the drive thru the man that took my order looked at me and said "the usual"? Okay, it was not two Big Mac's and fries...just diet coke with extra ice!! So sorry you recognized me. Next time I will drive thru incognito. Or maybe there should not be a next time because I just bought a case of Dr. Pepper with real sugar. Not a bottle mind you, but a case. If I am going to jump into the water, I am jumping in with both feet. Good bye saccharin...only the real stuff for me!

Let There Be Light.....

Wow!!! It is home improvement time at the Shubzda house. Well it is only a small home update but boy does it make me feel better. In fact, it makes me feel GREAT!
To be honest, we have really only been in our home for five years. No, it was not new when we bought it but it was not old either. We simply moved in, and accepted things the way they were except to put a little paint on the walls for color. Sometimes it takes awhile to get the feel of a place. I do not have a real flair for design and I surely do not have a definite style. I am a hodge podge of things. So we really just live like we are.
But I had an idea...it was about lights! That is another thing I am not...a lover of lights. My family will attest to the fact that we live in the dark. I love natural light from uncovered windows but nothing that needs a lightbulb. A single lamp in the room is plenty for me. But bring on the pendant lights, not so much to use but to break up a kitchen that was feeling kind of boxy and empty and I am like a new person. It really makes me wonder if something as simple as a few new inexpensive lights could give a guy the ultimate high that I am feeling. What does it take to give him that on top of the world feeling? Maybe catching a huge fish, new windshield wipers on a truck, a clean toolbox, or would it take something much more intrinsic???

Bet, it is not light fixtures!

So tonight I am smiling. It is a huge pick me up that will last me until I feel the need to work a few more days. I am thinking in terms of paint for the laundry room but I am not quite there emotionally yet..maybe next month.

And as my daughter-in-law would say...."do not judge me" by the fact that I still have a Christmas cookie jar on the counter and a refrigerator covered with mess like preschool mothers do. I will take care of that eventually...right now I am just going to enjoy this feel good mood because I have new lights!