Jeffrey William Flowers
It was a sad weekend. Another good friend lost her child. It was a freak unexpected event. Jeff died of pneumonia. No one dies of pneumonia anymore at such a young age but Jeff did. Bill and Linda lost their firstborn son. He was only 37 and he is gone, leaving a young wife and four children. How do you deal with that?
I have been there. I lost my firstborn son, unexpectedly, tragically. When I saw Linda at the service we hugged. "We are now sisters" she said. I don't want to be her sister. I do not ever want anyone to join this sisterhood. The one of lost children. The union of parents who have buried their kids...it is wrong.
I know first hand that these first days are a blur. The reality has not set in. Days, weeks from now Bill and Linda will understand the finality of all this. They will know that they are dealing with life as it will be from now on. I hurt for them. I want to tell them that the hole in their heart will not mend. I want to say that it sucks. I want them to know that the picture they saw of their lifetime has changed forever...but I won't tell them that. I will tell them what else I know...you will go on. With the help of friends and the hand of God they will make it. I want to tell them that it is okay to grieve for as many days as they need to. It is their right...but then you compartmentalize and move forward. You focus on the days ahead and know that you are given a cross to carry and you can do it because you have help...your friends and your faith.
I am sorry Bill and Linda....I don't want you to be part of my family if this is the family you have joined . I love you all and hope at some point I can be part of a picture that helps give you strength. So many were here for me.
It was a sad weekend. Another good friend lost her child. It was a freak unexpected event. Jeff died of pneumonia. No one dies of pneumonia anymore at such a young age but Jeff did. Bill and Linda lost their firstborn son. He was only 37 and he is gone, leaving a young wife and four children. How do you deal with that?I have been there. I lost my firstborn son, unexpectedly, tragically. When I saw Linda at the service we hugged. "We are now sisters" she said. I don't want to be her sister. I do not ever want anyone to join this sisterhood. The one of lost children. The union of parents who have buried their kids...it is wrong.
I know first hand that these first days are a blur. The reality has not set in. Days, weeks from now Bill and Linda will understand the finality of all this. They will know that they are dealing with life as it will be from now on. I hurt for them. I want to tell them that the hole in their heart will not mend. I want to say that it sucks. I want them to know that the picture they saw of their lifetime has changed forever...but I won't tell them that. I will tell them what else I know...you will go on. With the help of friends and the hand of God they will make it. I want to tell them that it is okay to grieve for as many days as they need to. It is their right...but then you compartmentalize and move forward. You focus on the days ahead and know that you are given a cross to carry and you can do it because you have help...your friends and your faith.
I am sorry Bill and Linda....I don't want you to be part of my family if this is the family you have joined . I love you all and hope at some point I can be part of a picture that helps give you strength. So many were here for me.
Patti - I am stunned! I had no idea Jeff died! He and Tony were good friends when they were young, and we spent a lot of time with their family! How sad!
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