Thanks....

Once again, I thought I would skip an entry today but today is a day that I feel like it is time for thanks. As odd as it is, that is how I am feeling and I want to remember this on days that maybe my mind is not exactly in this peaceful place.

Thanks....to my family for hanging in there. I have been the one that has been the most verbal about my thoughts and feelings and you have listened. I have had days that I was not very nice because of the grief that was in my heart and you for the most part over looked it. I love you all. You are what I live for. Thank you for hanging in there with me while I processed it all.

Thanks...to my friends for remembering to remember. Sadness is not something you want to share. After a while it becomes my pain and a melancholy person is not any fun. But, you all do remember when it matters and your love and concern has lifted me over my rough spots, like today. Though I do not always respond, I do know that you are there. I love you all very much and a life without close friends would be a very empty place.

Thanks...to God. Where do you go when you do not believe? In eight years I have been through mad, sad, feelings of despair, and even hate. I have questioned and yelled at God for putting this in my life. When all was so beautiful and I was in such a good place, He threw this at me. But, God has hung in there with me and given me time to find understanding. I believe I have healed. That does not mean I have forgotten or ever will, but I accept. That is a good place to be. I am at peace finally and see that where there is faith, there is hope.

So with a heart full of thanks I close this and know this is how it is supposed to be.

Don't grieve for me for now I'm free

I'm following the path God laid for me.

I took His hand when I heard Him call,

I turned my back and left it all.

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief.

Don't lengthen it now with undue grief.

Lift up your heart and share with me,

God wanted me now, He set me free.